King DeDeDe's Penguin Poop

The Kirby's Rainbow Resort message boards are still broken, which means the original translation is still lost. But I've decided to translate this fic again anyway, because the KRR translation added 2 scenes that were not in the original and removed all the swear words. This translation will be more faithful to the source material.

This is the second piece of fanfiction that I wrote in my life. Even though it started as a weird joke I made up on the spot while talking to myself, is more of a cross-over of everything that popped into my head than a proper Kirby fanfic and the jokes continue to revolve around poop, it's still leagues above my previous fanfic: it's the lenght of an average chapter and at least something actually happens! No matter how cringe "poop factories" and "gay tiaras" may be, there will always be a place in my heart for this era of my fanfics. Because the most important thing about writing is having fun, and I sure had fun writing this!

Trigger warning: swearing, poop, selling poop

One day, King DeDeDe was sitting in his garden. He was tanning and thinking about his plans for the future. Suddenly, one of his Waddle Dees farted so loudly, that his castle exploded!

King DeDeDe banished him from Dreamland forever. But there was one big problem - he couldn't afford to renovate his castle! But he found a safe in the castle that had a million dollars! But Meta Knight told him that it's his safe and he wants to spend that on dates with his favorite anime voice actresses. The King begged him to give him that money, but no matter what he promised, Meta Knight kept saying no. He told the King to go make that money himself. Then King DeDeDe got so angry, that they became rivals. The anger made him take a shit so huge, that it could be sold!

He sold the shit, and got 1000 dollars! But he still couldn't afford a castle renovation. He spent his newly gained money on meals that resulted in horrible poop, taught his Waddle Dees to shit like penguins, and turned the ruins of his castle into a penguin shit factory! Sometimes he even shat in there himself to make as much money as possible.

His plan started working - he already made 100 thousand dollars! But he spent it all on a new factory and went bankrupt... He couldn't even buy more food for his Waddle Dees.

King DeDeDe tried everything to make that money back: pole dancing, begging and even making a gofundme. But his gofundme ended up on r/dontfundme and it was all for nothing!

A week later he took a gigantic shit once again - it was bigger than ever before! And it was golden too! So he sold the shit and got 300 thousand dollars!

Thanks to his money, he made an advertisement for his shit and it sold like crazy!

After 5 days, he could finally afford a castle renovation! Half of his Waddle Dees worked on the renovation, and the other half made penguin shit. In the meantime, King DeDeDe flew on a vacation to Japan. Meta Knight happened to be there too, because he went on dates with the women who voice his favorite anime characters. He got their autographs and learned about their day-to-day lives. They became great friends. Almost like he had his own fanclub. He decided to stay with them in Japan.

Suddenly the voices of his favorite characters pointed at the King. They wondered who he was. Meta Knight told them the whole story. His new friends started to hate King DeDeDe. Thay said that they couldn't believe he used to live with such a bastard. King DeDeDe heard that. He took his hammer out and tried to crush them. When Meta Knight noticed that, they started to fight. The battle was sexy and epic and everything. Meta Knight won. His admirers congratulated him and started to hug him, but he told them that he doesn't like that.

King DeDeDe was VERY mad. He continued to walk down the street, and suddenly he noticed King Julien. They introduced themselves to each other and became friends. They went to a restaurant together, talked about their royal lives, and even played Minecraft! They love to collect "green bums" XD?

Suddenly, King DeDeDe got a call from one of his Waddle Dees. It turns out that the Waddle Dee who ruined his castle returned to Dreamland! And it has horrible plans!

King DeDeDe gets VERY mad when there's someone out there worse than him. He wanted to fly back to Dreamland, but King Julien said that he will take care of that for him.

King Julien discovered that the ''Waddle Dee'' was actually Demon Kirby?! He only pretended to be a Waddle Dee to make destroying the castle easier! King Julien quickly called King DeDeDe to notify him. King DeDeDe immidietaly went back to Dreamland to beat Demon Kirby. He was already defeated once that day, and didn't want to be again! He quickly took out his hammer and got to work. The fight wasn't as epic as the previous one, but it was equally sexy.

He was about to lose, but all the Waddle Dees helped! Demon Kirby went back to hell!

DeDeDe's Waddle Dees went back to work.

After 5 months, the castle was restored, penguin shit was selling, and King DeDeDe was happy.

End of Part 1 - to be continued in ,,King DeDeDe's Penguin Poop II - Pingu's Penguin Poop''